But in a way, I don't. It is really hard to describe. It is very freeing not checking it every five minutes, which is what I was doing, but I miss sharing stuff and seeing everyone's stuff they are sharing. But, it is only 40 days and it will do me good.
I have thought of several status updates (of course) and have nowhere to put them. Most of them have had to do with the kids, or lack of sleep, you know, the usual. But today I have had a really good day marketing my new private practice and I have gotten a lot accomplished with both boys in Mother's Day Out so it has been a good day. I am hoping by next week to have my brochures and website updated and I have called several pediatrician offices and they are VERY eager to have referral material. So, it is a good day.
Oh, and I got my hair done so it is an even better day with new color and trim!!!
Hopefully, in the weeks to come I will have much more in depth thoughts and feelings and try to get out of the habit of writing snippets on my life, like I do on facebook, and get down to some deep stuff from my heart.
I'm looking forward to it!
Getting off facebook for a while
I am signing off of facebook for a while, during lent, but it really has to do more than just lent. I need to be updating this blog more often, writing more often, which is why I started this blog in the first place. I update on facebook so much that I don't write, and I know it is something I am supposed to be doing.
Also, Greg is going to Haiti on a mission trip March 12-20th. I really need a place to vent some feelings and update people on his trip. I hope that I will be able to communicate with him during that time, but we have Verizon and have learned that Verizon does not work in Haiti.
Please be praying for Greg's safety and my sanity as I have the boys all to myself that week. Also, what the Lord is wanting to teach Greg and I during this time. I definitely fear for his safety there, yet I know it is where he is supposed to be and the Lord will take care of the rest.
So, hopefully, during the next 40 days I will be updating here more often and writing more often like I should be doing anyway instead of being distracted with facebook.
Hope you can tag along.
Susan
Also, Greg is going to Haiti on a mission trip March 12-20th. I really need a place to vent some feelings and update people on his trip. I hope that I will be able to communicate with him during that time, but we have Verizon and have learned that Verizon does not work in Haiti.
Please be praying for Greg's safety and my sanity as I have the boys all to myself that week. Also, what the Lord is wanting to teach Greg and I during this time. I definitely fear for his safety there, yet I know it is where he is supposed to be and the Lord will take care of the rest.
So, hopefully, during the next 40 days I will be updating here more often and writing more often like I should be doing anyway instead of being distracted with facebook.
Hope you can tag along.
Susan
Griffin is nine months old
We have been very busy the past month moving into our new home. I finally updated Griffin's baby website and decided to post it on here. I can't believe in three months my baby is going to be one year old. Very hard to believe!
Click here to visit updated pictures along with Griffin's first Christmas and our first Christmas in our new home. We are still unpacking and I haven't started decorating, but the boys are all settled in and we are looking forward to seeing them grow up here.
Be looking for even more pictures soon. Carter turns four on the 16th! I can't believe it!
Click here to visit updated pictures along with Griffin's first Christmas and our first Christmas in our new home. We are still unpacking and I haven't started decorating, but the boys are all settled in and we are looking forward to seeing them grow up here.
Be looking for even more pictures soon. Carter turns four on the 16th! I can't believe it!
Repetitive Annoyances or Precious Memories?
This morning Carter woke up early and crawled up with me in my chair. He had all 10 or so of his Chick fil A books that he has been carrying around now for several days, literally. He takes them to bed with him, he wakes up with them. He takes them in the living room and stacks them. If they fall over, he has a meltdown. Sometimes, he helps them fall over, then he has a meltdown...."NOOOoooooooooooooo!", he'll shout. It gets old. Whether it's having to find a beloved toy so that he can go to sleep or having to watch Larry Boy and the Bad Apple video 40 times before he moves on to the next video we'll watch, the routine can be very taxing on us grown ups. What's calming to them can drive us crazy.
This morning he wanted me to read his books to him, all 10 or so. Greg also reads all of them before he goes to bed at night, also upon request. As I was reading them to him (thankfully, he got distracted and I was able to stop at two or three books) he kept repeating the same response he does when Greg reads to him at night. He points to the pictures and says something about it, always the same. He likes his books to be read in order and if you skip a page....well, he will take you right back where you left off. The little fellow can't read but he sure knows his pictures.
There are umpteen different things that Carter says or does in his routine that can get REALLY old!
1. The way he has to say, "probably" before he answers anything we ask him, it is always said in a questioning tone. An example:
Me: Carter, do you want a cereal bar for a snack?
Carter: Probably, I would get sick if I ate a cereal bar.
2. The grunting noise he is currently doing with his mouth, just because he learned how and can
3. The way I have to give twenty hugs and twenty kisses at bedtime, not five, not ten...twenty each.
4. Carter has to have warm milk every morning. (EW!)
5. He carries his very tattered (no exaggeration) yellow blankies with him around the house.
6. The way he wants to wear his spiderman crocs with EVERYTHING, even on Sunday to church
7. The way he eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches every day and would be perfectly content if that was all he had to eat.
8. On that note, the way he scoffs at anything in casserole form I put on his plate for dinner. Meat, too.
9. The way bananas are ONLY for night time snack, he cannot have them any other time of the day.
10 The way that the term, "fruit" to him means those little fruit cups you buy in the store. Fresh strawberries, bananas and apples are NOT fruit! When he says fruit you know he means those little cups from the pantry. :-) And I could go on and on and on.
Everything has to have an order to it and if you get it out of order you will know it immediately. It's part of how he is developing. Sometimes we go along with him and sometimes we have to tell him he can't have his way or that it's okay to veer off in a different direction than the one he is going in.
Most of the time Greg and I roll our eyes at the endless repetitiveness of our preschool aged son. Sometimes we get really tired of the routine. Like this morning. I really wanted to sit in my chair, drink my coffee and have my devotions. So as I was sitting there reading his little books to him, I started resenting the routine. Then I remembered that he wasn't always going to be this little. And soon the routine would stop. Before too long, I will have to be searching him out and wanting him to include us in his routine, or insist that our regular routine as a family is still in place even though he has become a busy teenager and might think it uncool to hang with the 'rents! I can't imagine that day but I know it is coming.
So, I read him his books and smiled. It really warmed my heart. The next time I am having to do something that seems endlessly boring and routine I will try to remember that this too shall pass, and I will be longing for the days when he can sit in my lap and give me a BIG hug and kiss, or twenty, and ask me to read to him.
This morning he wanted me to read his books to him, all 10 or so. Greg also reads all of them before he goes to bed at night, also upon request. As I was reading them to him (thankfully, he got distracted and I was able to stop at two or three books) he kept repeating the same response he does when Greg reads to him at night. He points to the pictures and says something about it, always the same. He likes his books to be read in order and if you skip a page....well, he will take you right back where you left off. The little fellow can't read but he sure knows his pictures.
There are umpteen different things that Carter says or does in his routine that can get REALLY old!
1. The way he has to say, "probably" before he answers anything we ask him, it is always said in a questioning tone. An example:
Me: Carter, do you want a cereal bar for a snack?
Carter: Probably, I would get sick if I ate a cereal bar.
2. The grunting noise he is currently doing with his mouth, just because he learned how and can
3. The way I have to give twenty hugs and twenty kisses at bedtime, not five, not ten...twenty each.
4. Carter has to have warm milk every morning. (EW!)
5. He carries his very tattered (no exaggeration) yellow blankies with him around the house.
6. The way he wants to wear his spiderman crocs with EVERYTHING, even on Sunday to church
7. The way he eats peanut butter and jelly sandwiches every day and would be perfectly content if that was all he had to eat.
8. On that note, the way he scoffs at anything in casserole form I put on his plate for dinner. Meat, too.
9. The way bananas are ONLY for night time snack, he cannot have them any other time of the day.
10 The way that the term, "fruit" to him means those little fruit cups you buy in the store. Fresh strawberries, bananas and apples are NOT fruit! When he says fruit you know he means those little cups from the pantry. :-) And I could go on and on and on.
Everything has to have an order to it and if you get it out of order you will know it immediately. It's part of how he is developing. Sometimes we go along with him and sometimes we have to tell him he can't have his way or that it's okay to veer off in a different direction than the one he is going in.
Most of the time Greg and I roll our eyes at the endless repetitiveness of our preschool aged son. Sometimes we get really tired of the routine. Like this morning. I really wanted to sit in my chair, drink my coffee and have my devotions. So as I was sitting there reading his little books to him, I started resenting the routine. Then I remembered that he wasn't always going to be this little. And soon the routine would stop. Before too long, I will have to be searching him out and wanting him to include us in his routine, or insist that our regular routine as a family is still in place even though he has become a busy teenager and might think it uncool to hang with the 'rents! I can't imagine that day but I know it is coming.
So, I read him his books and smiled. It really warmed my heart. The next time I am having to do something that seems endlessly boring and routine I will try to remember that this too shall pass, and I will be longing for the days when he can sit in my lap and give me a BIG hug and kiss, or twenty, and ask me to read to him.
Griffin is FIVE months old!
Very hard to believe that my baby is growing up so fast. We have updated his website with new pictures, which are cute and adorable.
You can go to his website here. Enjoy!!!! He is total cuteness. I'm not biased at all.
I am feeling much better. I still have my hormonal moments (bless Greg's heart) but all in all, I feel life is taking an upswing and I am only waiting for it to get better.
Thanks to everyone for your thoughts and concerns!
After Griffin turns one year all the family updates will be on here and I will be posting on this site much more frequently.
See ya!
You can go to his website here. Enjoy!!!! He is total cuteness. I'm not biased at all.
I am feeling much better. I still have my hormonal moments (bless Greg's heart) but all in all, I feel life is taking an upswing and I am only waiting for it to get better.
Thanks to everyone for your thoughts and concerns!
After Griffin turns one year all the family updates will be on here and I will be posting on this site much more frequently.
See ya!
The Baby Blues, part two
This is a continuation of a post from earlier in the day.
God has been speaking to me in small ways here and there. Even if I didn't always feel that He was there, I kept searching for Him and asking Him to show up. And he started to in many small ways. I was just so ready for the heaviness in my heart to be extinguished. There were many verses along the way that I clung to:
Psalm 94:19
In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul
Phillipians 4:6-13
Phil 4:6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your heart and minds through Christ Jesus.
Phil 4:13
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Psalm 121
And many, many more. I just clung to them in the fog.
Then, today I was just simply reminded that God Is. He has reminded me that He is Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end; the God who Was and Is and Is to be. Period. That is the reason for this post, because I can't remain silent.
I was reading Oswald Chambers for a change this morning and I can’t even remember now what I was reading, except that it convicted me, as usual. My Utmost for His Highest has a way of doing that. But in my mind I had a song playing in my head that I knew was a scripture passage and if something is in my head and it stays there I tend to either look it up or listen to the song, whichever it is. The words that were going through my mind were,
“Eye has not seen, ear has not heard…”
I knew the tune and I am somewhat embarrassed to say that it is from a Southern Gospel song from the 1990’s. But it was a great song. Those were the only words I could remember out of that song. I knew who sang it, I knew who wrote it, but that is all I could think of. I started looking up those words in the bible and was surprised at what I found.
But it is written, eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him. I Corinthians 2:9
At first I wondered why this verse was in my head. Nothing stood out except for the grandness of God and how amazing and powerful He is, and how I, a mere human on this earth, have not heard or seen anything compared to what God has in store for those that love Him. So I stumbled upon some commentary readings online. And Matthew Henry’s stuck out to me the most. I was humbled and in awe because I knew God was speaking to me; the God who I wanted to question and the God that I had trouble, “feeling”.
Here is what it said,
“…There are things that God hath prepared for those that love him and wait for him, which sense cannot discover, no teaching can convey to our ears, nor can it yet enter our hearts. We must take them as they stand in the Scriptures, as God hath been pleased to reveal them to us.”
Wow. God reminded me, again, that not only is He real, but even though I can’t see him or hear him (in the literal sense) He is here. It brought me peace. I don’t know why I have to be reminded of Who God Is, but I do. Then I am humbled, and grateful, and in awe.
“We must take them as they stand in the Scriptures”. It is enough. He is a great mystery. I can’t see Him, I can’t touch Him. But He is here. And my heart will be healed. He just wants me to hold on and cling to Him and to know He is real.
One of the Glory Revealed CD’s has this song on it entitled, ‘Since the World Began’, which is scripture out of Isaiah 64:4 which is where the scripture in I Corinthians references.
“Since the world began no ear has heard, no eye has seen a God like You, Oh a God like You…”
I don’t think it is a coincidence that I have been listening to that CD, and other worship CD’s for comfort. I don’t like feeling dead inside. But I know that I am not dead inside. I know that I love God the best way that I can and I know He has prepared for me things that I cannot even imagine. I can’t even really put it into words in a way that even attempts the concept of Who Christ is. That’s how big He is.
It’s like I had to start back at the beginning, again. It starts with the humbleness and awe that believing that God is real in spite of not having the taste, touch, feel and hear aspect of Who He Is. I just have to trust Him and take Him at His Word. Then I am reminded over and over of the things He has done in my life. I don’t understand why He doesn't get tired of me and my questions. I am thankful that He never will.
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not SEEN (emphasis mine). Hebrews 11:1
God has been speaking to me in small ways here and there. Even if I didn't always feel that He was there, I kept searching for Him and asking Him to show up. And he started to in many small ways. I was just so ready for the heaviness in my heart to be extinguished. There were many verses along the way that I clung to:
Psalm 94:19
In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul
Phillipians 4:6-13
Phil 4:6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your heart and minds through Christ Jesus.
Phil 4:13
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Psalm 121
And many, many more. I just clung to them in the fog.
Then, today I was just simply reminded that God Is. He has reminded me that He is Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end; the God who Was and Is and Is to be. Period. That is the reason for this post, because I can't remain silent.
I was reading Oswald Chambers for a change this morning and I can’t even remember now what I was reading, except that it convicted me, as usual. My Utmost for His Highest has a way of doing that. But in my mind I had a song playing in my head that I knew was a scripture passage and if something is in my head and it stays there I tend to either look it up or listen to the song, whichever it is. The words that were going through my mind were,
“Eye has not seen, ear has not heard…”
I knew the tune and I am somewhat embarrassed to say that it is from a Southern Gospel song from the 1990’s. But it was a great song. Those were the only words I could remember out of that song. I knew who sang it, I knew who wrote it, but that is all I could think of. I started looking up those words in the bible and was surprised at what I found.
But it is written, eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him. I Corinthians 2:9
At first I wondered why this verse was in my head. Nothing stood out except for the grandness of God and how amazing and powerful He is, and how I, a mere human on this earth, have not heard or seen anything compared to what God has in store for those that love Him. So I stumbled upon some commentary readings online. And Matthew Henry’s stuck out to me the most. I was humbled and in awe because I knew God was speaking to me; the God who I wanted to question and the God that I had trouble, “feeling”.
Here is what it said,
“…There are things that God hath prepared for those that love him and wait for him, which sense cannot discover, no teaching can convey to our ears, nor can it yet enter our hearts. We must take them as they stand in the Scriptures, as God hath been pleased to reveal them to us.”
Wow. God reminded me, again, that not only is He real, but even though I can’t see him or hear him (in the literal sense) He is here. It brought me peace. I don’t know why I have to be reminded of Who God Is, but I do. Then I am humbled, and grateful, and in awe.
“We must take them as they stand in the Scriptures”. It is enough. He is a great mystery. I can’t see Him, I can’t touch Him. But He is here. And my heart will be healed. He just wants me to hold on and cling to Him and to know He is real.
One of the Glory Revealed CD’s has this song on it entitled, ‘Since the World Began’, which is scripture out of Isaiah 64:4 which is where the scripture in I Corinthians references.
“Since the world began no ear has heard, no eye has seen a God like You, Oh a God like You…”
I don’t think it is a coincidence that I have been listening to that CD, and other worship CD’s for comfort. I don’t like feeling dead inside. But I know that I am not dead inside. I know that I love God the best way that I can and I know He has prepared for me things that I cannot even imagine. I can’t even really put it into words in a way that even attempts the concept of Who Christ is. That’s how big He is.
It’s like I had to start back at the beginning, again. It starts with the humbleness and awe that believing that God is real in spite of not having the taste, touch, feel and hear aspect of Who He Is. I just have to trust Him and take Him at His Word. Then I am reminded over and over of the things He has done in my life. I don’t understand why He doesn't get tired of me and my questions. I am thankful that He never will.
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not SEEN (emphasis mine). Hebrews 11:1
The Baby Blues, part one
I will lift up my eyes to the hills---From whence comes my help? My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth. Psalm 121:1
Having two kids changes things, in many ways. Everyone tells you that. Everyone tells you that no two babies are the same. But nothing can prepare you for having two kids. You remember the exhaustion of having a newborn in the house. You remember your hormones (at least the women do) and you remember the feeling of just waiting to get past the first six to eight weeks, because anything before that was really just a blur.
Then, when you think things have calmed down, you might have this handling two kids down a little bit, it hits. You remember this feeling. You had it with your first child. The feelings of being overwhelmed. The anxiety. The fear. All unfounded, irrational and unlikely. But yet, it is there, creeping slowly into your heart making you feel dead inside.
Whether you call it "the baby blues" or Post-Partum Depression, it really doesn't matter because it puts a total damper on bringing new life into the world and no matter how hard you attempt not to feel that way it seeps in like a slow leak in your lifeboat. And pretty soon you feel like you are going to drown.
For me, this also affects every aspect of my life. I question everything. There are things in my mind and heart that I know are irrational and I keep telling myself that but you feel so dead inside, or unfeeling, that it just makes sense that what you are feeling is reality. This also affects me spiritually. Being a new mom, it is difficult to get time with the Lord every day. This makes one even weaker spiritually. Then you feel so dead inside that you start to question even God's existence, His power, His creation, what He has done. Again, this is all irrational, and you know it, but not being able to feel anything you just begin to wonder. Satan loves to slip in and cause doubt and fear and whispers in your ear, "do you really believe all this???" I am just talking about the spiritual aspect of my fear. I will spare you the fear and anxiety regarding my children, husband, and life in general. But when you start doubting you entire belief system, you know things are going really downhill, really fast.
I can sit here and write this because, one, I know God already knows how I feel and He loves and accepts me right where I am. I don't have to fake it with Him. I don't have to put a smile on my face and greet Him in false joy. He knows. And it's okay because I am not going to be in this place forever. He understands. He know that I know He is the creator of the universe and that all things were made by Him and for Him and His pleasure. I believe there really is a heaven. I believe He made heaven and earth, but it is so big to me to think that right now. It overwhelms me much like the fear and anxiety that is putting a choke hold on my heart right now.
The only thing I knew to do was to keep on keeping on. I was taking care of myself physically the way that I needed to. So, it was just a matter of time. Even if I didn't feel like God was real at the moment, I knew in my heart, in deepest, darkest and smallest part of my heart that HE IS. And I clung to that.
When you cry out to God, He responds. He listens. It may not be in the very moment an answer that you are looking for but it doesn't mean He isn't there. The Lord was able to reach me in rare moments of clarity and I clung to that. Even if I didn't feel it for a long time.
I am going to continue this post tomorrow. It is a post of victory. God's victory. He is the Healer. The Ultimate Healer. He is Truth. He is Righteousness. And He is REAL. I will share the verses I clung to in the midst of my BLAH and anxiety. I am not all the way there, but spiritually,I know He is working in me and I am beginning to feel. And it's a good feel. My circumstances haven't changed that much, but my heart has. And for that I am thankful.
More tomorrow or later today.
Having two kids changes things, in many ways. Everyone tells you that. Everyone tells you that no two babies are the same. But nothing can prepare you for having two kids. You remember the exhaustion of having a newborn in the house. You remember your hormones (at least the women do) and you remember the feeling of just waiting to get past the first six to eight weeks, because anything before that was really just a blur.
Then, when you think things have calmed down, you might have this handling two kids down a little bit, it hits. You remember this feeling. You had it with your first child. The feelings of being overwhelmed. The anxiety. The fear. All unfounded, irrational and unlikely. But yet, it is there, creeping slowly into your heart making you feel dead inside.
Whether you call it "the baby blues" or Post-Partum Depression, it really doesn't matter because it puts a total damper on bringing new life into the world and no matter how hard you attempt not to feel that way it seeps in like a slow leak in your lifeboat. And pretty soon you feel like you are going to drown.
For me, this also affects every aspect of my life. I question everything. There are things in my mind and heart that I know are irrational and I keep telling myself that but you feel so dead inside, or unfeeling, that it just makes sense that what you are feeling is reality. This also affects me spiritually. Being a new mom, it is difficult to get time with the Lord every day. This makes one even weaker spiritually. Then you feel so dead inside that you start to question even God's existence, His power, His creation, what He has done. Again, this is all irrational, and you know it, but not being able to feel anything you just begin to wonder. Satan loves to slip in and cause doubt and fear and whispers in your ear, "do you really believe all this???" I am just talking about the spiritual aspect of my fear. I will spare you the fear and anxiety regarding my children, husband, and life in general. But when you start doubting you entire belief system, you know things are going really downhill, really fast.
I can sit here and write this because, one, I know God already knows how I feel and He loves and accepts me right where I am. I don't have to fake it with Him. I don't have to put a smile on my face and greet Him in false joy. He knows. And it's okay because I am not going to be in this place forever. He understands. He know that I know He is the creator of the universe and that all things were made by Him and for Him and His pleasure. I believe there really is a heaven. I believe He made heaven and earth, but it is so big to me to think that right now. It overwhelms me much like the fear and anxiety that is putting a choke hold on my heart right now.
The only thing I knew to do was to keep on keeping on. I was taking care of myself physically the way that I needed to. So, it was just a matter of time. Even if I didn't feel like God was real at the moment, I knew in my heart, in deepest, darkest and smallest part of my heart that HE IS. And I clung to that.
When you cry out to God, He responds. He listens. It may not be in the very moment an answer that you are looking for but it doesn't mean He isn't there. The Lord was able to reach me in rare moments of clarity and I clung to that. Even if I didn't feel it for a long time.
I am going to continue this post tomorrow. It is a post of victory. God's victory. He is the Healer. The Ultimate Healer. He is Truth. He is Righteousness. And He is REAL. I will share the verses I clung to in the midst of my BLAH and anxiety. I am not all the way there, but spiritually,I know He is working in me and I am beginning to feel. And it's a good feel. My circumstances haven't changed that much, but my heart has. And for that I am thankful.
More tomorrow or later today.
Sigh....melted heart!
At first I wondered how do you get your child to tell you he loves you, without prompting him? I kept telling him I loved him from the time he was born and so wanted to hear those words. We are very affectionate with Carter and he loves giving kisses and hugs and we had millions of, oh, so snuggly moments. I knew I felt the love from him, I just wanted to hear him say it. So, even though I showed him I loved him, and told him I loved him, he still had to be taught to say the words. But even though he would repeat the words when I asked him to I felt they really didn't count until they came from his HEART.
That happened last week when Carter came into the kitchen while Greg and I were discussing our day. Carter comes in and wrapped his arms around my legs and gave me a big hug and said, "I love you, mama, I love you". My heart MELTED. It was gone. I looked at Greg and I was nearly in tears. It was so sweet. And, of course, I told him I loved him too and hugged him back.
This weekend Greg and I had been away and my sister was keeping our kids. When we came back to her house Greg and Carter were sitting on the couch. Carter was curled up in Greg's lap and they were watching Monsters, Inc. (for the gazillionith time!). Carter hugs Greg and curls up a little bit closer to him and says, "I love you dad, I love you". Greg, my niece and myself all look at each other and I think I am going to burst into tears again! Greg tells him he loves him too and Carter repeats it a second and third time. It was precious!!!
It makes it ALL worth it!
That happened last week when Carter came into the kitchen while Greg and I were discussing our day. Carter comes in and wrapped his arms around my legs and gave me a big hug and said, "I love you, mama, I love you". My heart MELTED. It was gone. I looked at Greg and I was nearly in tears. It was so sweet. And, of course, I told him I loved him too and hugged him back.
This weekend Greg and I had been away and my sister was keeping our kids. When we came back to her house Greg and Carter were sitting on the couch. Carter was curled up in Greg's lap and they were watching Monsters, Inc. (for the gazillionith time!). Carter hugs Greg and curls up a little bit closer to him and says, "I love you dad, I love you". Greg, my niece and myself all look at each other and I think I am going to burst into tears again! Greg tells him he loves him too and Carter repeats it a second and third time. It was precious!!!
It makes it ALL worth it!
Griffin is two months old!!!!!
I have updated Griffin’s webpage with new pics! Stop by if you have a minute and take a look! Enjoy!
http://www.babyjellybeans.com/web/do/site/home?ID=516613
Love,
The Mayo’s
http://www.babyjellybeans.com/web/do/site/home?ID=516613
Love,
The Mayo’s
Sleepless nights, reflux and colic...
Well, I don't know about the colic, I think Griffin is just fussy because he hurts. He has reflux and I think sometimes he just doesn't feel good. He wants to be held a lot. But I am jumping ahead.
Griffin is almost 2 months old. I will update his website next week with new pictures. I have his birth announcement all ready and I am just waiting for it to be printed. I took the pictures myself and a friend of mine photoshopped the announcement. It looks so good!!! I say that because I didn't do it, I just took the pictures. :) I am very thankful for my friend, Sarah, though!!!
The reflux has really thrown us for a loop. Carter never had it and was a VERY easy baby. And I have to say that Griffin is still an easy baby, in temperament, he just is fussy and hurts sometimes. I would too if my little digestive tract wasn't all the way developed and is trying to grow up to keep up with the baby, which it eventually will. He will outgrow this. We are also blessed in that Griffin's reflux is not the "spit-up" kind. He just sounded like he was very sick with a chest cold and congestion when I took him to the ped. He was coughing and choking when he ate. (insert very sad mommy face here). It stunk. But the meds are working and he is a very happy little boy. We have to keep him upright for 30 minutes after his feedings, we switched bottles (mainly for gas issues) and we are on a special thicker formula. After the feeding in the night he gets to sleep in his car seat, which he doesn't seem to mind too much! LOL.
Griffin has slept through the night at least 4 nights, two of them being the past two nights. We are especially thankful for that because I was getting to the point of losing my mind, literally. It just really wears a person down. I probably have a low tolerance level because the Lord has blessed me with good sleepers. I was concerned about the reflux hindering Griffin sleeping because a lot of reflux babies have difficulty sleeping comfortably. But, he is letting us sleep until 5:00 am now, which is wonderful.
Carter is still adjusting very well. He has been in the terrible three's (instead of the terrible two's, which he skipped) for a while now so I honestly have not seen any new behaviors, but he does act out. He is Mr.-Independent-I-DO-IT!!!!!!! Little man and some days whatever I say, and I mean EVERYTHING, he does completely opposite.
I am going to close with some pictures I took of Griffin and Carter for his birth announcement. These didn't make it in but a lot of them turned out really cute! Enjoy!
Griffin Ryder Mayo has arrived!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Griffin Ryder arrived at 3:17 pm on Thursday, April 16th at 3:17 PM. He weighed 7 lbs and 4 1/2 oz and is 20 1/2 inches long. He is perfect and healthy!
Baby Griffin
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Love this picture of Daddy and Griffin
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Dr. Dunn, my OB with Griffin and I after the delivery
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Awww.....love this pic! Daddy, Carter and Griffin
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Mommy, Daddy and Griffin...we need to get a whole family shot including Carter
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Baby Griffin
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Love this picture of Daddy and Griffin
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Dr. Dunn, my OB with Griffin and I after the delivery
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Awww.....love this pic! Daddy, Carter and Griffin
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Mommy, Daddy and Griffin...we need to get a whole family shot including Carter
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Carter's potty breakthrough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We have been attempting potty training for some time now with Carter. We introduced him to the potty chair very early and we have all the videos, books, etc. Once he showed an interest we did all the things we were supposed to do in terms of helping him use the potty. I read all the books, we never pushed him, and we basically just allowed him to attempt it when he felt ready.
Well, we hit a wall around the time he hit three. Carter loved watching the videos, reading the books, he even took his stuffed bear and put big boy underwear on him, had him sit in the potty chair, wiped his bottom when he was through....everything, step by step. But, when you asked Carter to sit on the potty we all got a big, fat N-O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He did not want to sit on the potty. He did not want to wear big boy underwear. He did not want to wear a pull up. We had to reward him for just sitting on the potty without doing any "business". Eventually, though, he wouldn't even do that.
The other day we were, very positively, attempting to get him to wear big boy underwear and he was in tears. We didn't know what to do. He knows everything he needs to it is just a matter of his CHOOSING to do it.
Everyone had told us that eventually he would do it. I had to keep telling myself that he would be potty trained...everyone is, right? And so would he. I figured that one day, he would just sit on the potty and go......and guess what??????????????
HE DID!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here is the cute story of how Carter peed in the potty for the first time.
Carter asked to watch his Elmo Potty video (for the umpteenth time), I did not give it a second thought. I was busy in the kitchen preparing lunch when I saw Carter attempting to take his diaper off like a pull up. I helped him out because the one thing he will do is run around naked, which we have heard helps with potty training too. I went back to doing what I was doing and next thing I know Carter comes in the kitchen completely naked, and very pleased with himself. Of course I ask him if he needs to go pee pee, as I do most days, just because you never know, he might. He shakes his head "no", then "yes". But he wants me to stay in the kitchen. I ask him if he needs any help and he points his finger at me and says, "go, mama", pointing to the kitchen. He did not want me anywhere near him.
Well, I am quite intrigued at this point so I go into the kitchen and listen and watch him. In my mind I am thinking this is too good to be true. He is not actually going to go potty....I peeked around the corner and he was in the bathroom. Then I saw him sit, not in his potty chair, but the toilet. I picked up the phone to call Greg. I was whispering as not to disturb Carter or to let him know I was watching him. He stands up and appears to be playing with his cup we use for bath time. My hope starts to dwindle.
Then I saw him get back on the potty. I am giving Greg the play by play. He gets down and starts to stand at the potty (just like daddy). Carter gets very excited. He comes out to tell me he has peed. I start looking for evidence and have to admit it was very hard to find. I could see he had played in the water a bit, but I couldn't tell if any of the water on the toilet or floor was pee. He kept pointing to the toilet showing me where the pee was, he said, "it go, right in there" I was encouraging him anyways. I looked at the floor and in the toilet, desperately searching for something yellow and not clear. Then, I found it!
The drop of yellow pee on the rim!
That was all it took. I put Greg on speaker phone and we acted as if Carter had just won the World Series or some other amazing feat. Carter was so happy and pleased with himself. I didn't care if it was a dribble.....it was PEE. It was something. Then, Carter seemed to think he had more pee in him.. and he did!!!!!!!!!!!!! And this time it was a stream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!! I still had Greg on the phone and we played it up big. Carter was so excited!!!!!!! After he was done, we put sticker upon sticker on his chart. We reward in this house for pottying and I gave him the choice of a cookie or M & M and he chose cookie. With cookie in hand, he went back to the bathroom. It's like he couldn't get enough. I asked him if he wanted to tell Grandma Mayo and he shook his head "yes". I called Grandma Mayo to continue the applause and positive reinforcement. I asked if he wanted to call Nana..."no, not yet". Carter continued to pee, hit and miss, for a few more minutes. I am washing the rug right now. LOL! But who cares, it's PEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have never been so excited to see pee on the floor in my life. And the fact that he was skipping the chair all together and went straight to the pot! Yay!
I won't continue to bore you with all the details of our potty training day, but he is now napping with a pull-up on!!!!! I am not too worried about him peeing through it because he has been sick and hasn't had that many fluids so it's not a typical "soaker" of a day, if you know what I mean.
I know this is just the beginning and there will be many set backs. But he is doing it. He really WILL be potty trained! I just can't believe it!
I just hope Carter doesn't mind this being posted all over the Internet one day. While on the phone with Greg I actually said, "why don't I have the video camera on????" Like that is something he is going to show his girlfriends one day. I am sure he will be very thankful there is no video of his first pee in the potty. ha ha.
I have plenty of blackmail in other pictures to be shown to the public one day, preferably at his rehearsal dinner before he gets married....which is a very, very, very, long way away. Long ways away!
Thanks for reading this. I am one proud mama right now!
Well, we hit a wall around the time he hit three. Carter loved watching the videos, reading the books, he even took his stuffed bear and put big boy underwear on him, had him sit in the potty chair, wiped his bottom when he was through....everything, step by step. But, when you asked Carter to sit on the potty we all got a big, fat N-O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He did not want to sit on the potty. He did not want to wear big boy underwear. He did not want to wear a pull up. We had to reward him for just sitting on the potty without doing any "business". Eventually, though, he wouldn't even do that.
The other day we were, very positively, attempting to get him to wear big boy underwear and he was in tears. We didn't know what to do. He knows everything he needs to it is just a matter of his CHOOSING to do it.
Everyone had told us that eventually he would do it. I had to keep telling myself that he would be potty trained...everyone is, right? And so would he. I figured that one day, he would just sit on the potty and go......and guess what??????????????
HE DID!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here is the cute story of how Carter peed in the potty for the first time.
Carter asked to watch his Elmo Potty video (for the umpteenth time), I did not give it a second thought. I was busy in the kitchen preparing lunch when I saw Carter attempting to take his diaper off like a pull up. I helped him out because the one thing he will do is run around naked, which we have heard helps with potty training too. I went back to doing what I was doing and next thing I know Carter comes in the kitchen completely naked, and very pleased with himself. Of course I ask him if he needs to go pee pee, as I do most days, just because you never know, he might. He shakes his head "no", then "yes". But he wants me to stay in the kitchen. I ask him if he needs any help and he points his finger at me and says, "go, mama", pointing to the kitchen. He did not want me anywhere near him.
Well, I am quite intrigued at this point so I go into the kitchen and listen and watch him. In my mind I am thinking this is too good to be true. He is not actually going to go potty....I peeked around the corner and he was in the bathroom. Then I saw him sit, not in his potty chair, but the toilet. I picked up the phone to call Greg. I was whispering as not to disturb Carter or to let him know I was watching him. He stands up and appears to be playing with his cup we use for bath time. My hope starts to dwindle.
Then I saw him get back on the potty. I am giving Greg the play by play. He gets down and starts to stand at the potty (just like daddy). Carter gets very excited. He comes out to tell me he has peed. I start looking for evidence and have to admit it was very hard to find. I could see he had played in the water a bit, but I couldn't tell if any of the water on the toilet or floor was pee. He kept pointing to the toilet showing me where the pee was, he said, "it go, right in there" I was encouraging him anyways. I looked at the floor and in the toilet, desperately searching for something yellow and not clear. Then, I found it!
The drop of yellow pee on the rim!
That was all it took. I put Greg on speaker phone and we acted as if Carter had just won the World Series or some other amazing feat. Carter was so happy and pleased with himself. I didn't care if it was a dribble.....it was PEE. It was something. Then, Carter seemed to think he had more pee in him.. and he did!!!!!!!!!!!!! And this time it was a stream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!! I still had Greg on the phone and we played it up big. Carter was so excited!!!!!!! After he was done, we put sticker upon sticker on his chart. We reward in this house for pottying and I gave him the choice of a cookie or M & M and he chose cookie. With cookie in hand, he went back to the bathroom. It's like he couldn't get enough. I asked him if he wanted to tell Grandma Mayo and he shook his head "yes". I called Grandma Mayo to continue the applause and positive reinforcement. I asked if he wanted to call Nana..."no, not yet". Carter continued to pee, hit and miss, for a few more minutes. I am washing the rug right now. LOL! But who cares, it's PEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have never been so excited to see pee on the floor in my life. And the fact that he was skipping the chair all together and went straight to the pot! Yay!
I won't continue to bore you with all the details of our potty training day, but he is now napping with a pull-up on!!!!! I am not too worried about him peeing through it because he has been sick and hasn't had that many fluids so it's not a typical "soaker" of a day, if you know what I mean.
I know this is just the beginning and there will be many set backs. But he is doing it. He really WILL be potty trained! I just can't believe it!
I just hope Carter doesn't mind this being posted all over the Internet one day. While on the phone with Greg I actually said, "why don't I have the video camera on????" Like that is something he is going to show his girlfriends one day. I am sure he will be very thankful there is no video of his first pee in the potty. ha ha.
I have plenty of blackmail in other pictures to be shown to the public one day, preferably at his rehearsal dinner before he gets married....which is a very, very, very, long way away. Long ways away!
Thanks for reading this. I am one proud mama right now!
Carter's transition to his big boy bed...
Since baby boy #2 is due in less than 8 weeks we figured we better get started on a nursery for him. Which meant getting the crib away from Carter and into the nursery. Seeing as how potty training has not been going well I was thinking that moving Carter to a big boy bed would be more, well, traumatic. It could not have been more simpler.
We talked to him about a big boy bed for a while. And to be honest, I think he had outgrown the toddler bed, which is his crib that he had as a baby that converts to toddler then on to a double. I have posted a couple of pictures below that show him sprawled over the bed not looking too comfy for good sleeps. He also always liked being under mommy and daddy's covers, not that he got to do that too often.
So, last weekend we decided the time was right. Carter went with us to buy the bed. We already had a twin comforter for him all we had to do was get it ready. He seemed up to the task but you never really know until bedtime.
Well, bedtime came and went and he did his typical stuff. It took him a while to wind down, as usual, but there was no boo hooing for his toddler bed. There were no questions. Nothing.
So then I said, lets see if he makes it through the night......he did. No reaction at all. He loves his big boy bed. Obviously he was ready. If only potty training could be oh, so easy as this transition. Sigh.
Here are some pics in the toddler bed and the big move to the big boy bed. He looks so cute in it every night. And another bonus is that he uses a regular pillow now and covers up. He wouldn't hear of being covered up in his toddler bed, oh, no. Well, now he just snuggles right down in there. So Cute!!!!!!!!! But I am biased.
Here are some pics.
We talked to him about a big boy bed for a while. And to be honest, I think he had outgrown the toddler bed, which is his crib that he had as a baby that converts to toddler then on to a double. I have posted a couple of pictures below that show him sprawled over the bed not looking too comfy for good sleeps. He also always liked being under mommy and daddy's covers, not that he got to do that too often.
So, last weekend we decided the time was right. Carter went with us to buy the bed. We already had a twin comforter for him all we had to do was get it ready. He seemed up to the task but you never really know until bedtime.
Well, bedtime came and went and he did his typical stuff. It took him a while to wind down, as usual, but there was no boo hooing for his toddler bed. There were no questions. Nothing.
So then I said, lets see if he makes it through the night......he did. No reaction at all. He loves his big boy bed. Obviously he was ready. If only potty training could be oh, so easy as this transition. Sigh.
Here are some pics in the toddler bed and the big move to the big boy bed. He looks so cute in it every night. And another bonus is that he uses a regular pillow now and covers up. He wouldn't hear of being covered up in his toddler bed, oh, no. Well, now he just snuggles right down in there. So Cute!!!!!!!!! But I am biased.
Here are some pics.
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We call this Ode to Pooh. I think this was taken the day before we got his twin bed. I like to think of it as Carter remembering his wonderful time as a baby and being all comforted and loved by bringing all his stuffed animals from his nursery to his bed. Carter had a classic pooh nursery and we redecorated his room when we changed him into a toddler bed. All his animals and blankets have been stored in the office and recently, he has been getting into them a bit. We got baby brother new bedding because Carter seems quite attached to Pooh and well, we didn't want to have to make him share everything. One day for nap time I went in to check on him and here were all his pooh animals piled up next to him. Too sweet!.JPG)
You know, this just doesn't look comfortable. But this is how we found him one night after we had put him to bed. It takes him a while to wind down, which usually means some type of movement on his part and obviously, this was his last movement of the evening until he conked out! LOL
Another cute pose of Carter totally pooped! This was taken the day after his third birthday. I think he was just too pooped from all the activities of the weekend.
These next few pictures are of the big transition. If you are wondering what those things on the side of the finished bed are, those are rails so that he doesn't fall out of the bed. We will probably keep them up for a few months since we have a mover and a shaker! LOL!.JPG)
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*sniff sniff*
I can't believe my baby is a big boy.
*sigh*
Just wait until he poops in the potty. I will have to post a picture of that, too. Just like on Jon and Kate plus 8! Ha!
Counting My Blessings Today
As you all know I am pregnant and 40! Whew! Pregnancy is not for the faint of heart. All in all though, I have it pretty easy. I have been having a lot of pain this pregnancy, pelvic pain, to be specific. I am not sure if it is an actually disorder that is common in pregnancy or my old bones, but all I know is, I HURT. Especially this past week. It was bad. I had been helping out at a conference and standing for 3 hours straight at a time. Not good for the pelvic floor, let me tell you! Plus all the stretching that goes on and growing.
But, I have to say, I can wallow with the rest of them. And I was feeling it Thursday. I was just overwhelmed with pain and I didn't know how I was going to last three more months this uncomfortable. I am still in my second trimester, supposedly still feeling good...what is it going to be like next month.
Well, thankfully, the pain has gotten a lot better. I have had a couple of nights of good, restful sleep. And even though I am not pain-free, it is nothing like it was last week.
And even if it was, I need to be thankful that I have no complications during pregnancy. Baby is doing fine. I don't have to worry about health issues for me or the baby that might endanger either of us (some pregnant women I know do have to worry about those things). I have it pretty good and this too shall pass...and at the end, I will have a beautiful, healthy, baby boy, Lord willing. That is my prayer.
It really helped, also, to put things into perspective when one woman that I follow on a due date board online had her QUADRUPLETS on December 30th at 25 weeks. Yes, you read that right. She was just a couple of weeks ahead of me and had her babies. Whew! Everything was going great in her pregnancy. Obviously, she was high risk and followed very closely. She went into the doctor on the 30th and BAM! babies were coming. They thought they could stop the labor but the babies had other plans. It is amazing to see how they are doing and that they have all survived, none of them have brain bleeds, and most are not breathing on their own. Amazing.
Here is a link the their blog:
http://treverjennaeva.blogspot.com/
Next, another lady on the due date board online is having twins. It is a long, complicated story, but her membranes prematurely ruptured at 13 weeks. It is called pPROM (premature rupture of membranes). Usually this means the baby/babies will die because it is just too early to save them. Well, since it was twins, only one membrane ruptured. One twin is fine, the other is not. This lady is now 25 weeks or so. One of her twins will not live when he is born. The other should be fine. She also has a blog (warning: Offensive Language!!!!) that I follow:
http://notashamedinfertility.blogspot.com
There are several other stories that I could share that would break your heart or make you think, but these two are the primary ones I look at and say, "Thank you, Lord!". I have much to be thankful for. Even if I had to go through something like that, I should be thankful, but I am thankful that He has spared me that and has allowed me to have an uncomplicated pregnancy.
I have a lot to be thankful for!! I am going to try and remember this the next time I haven't slept or have intense pain. It could be a lot worse!!!
But, I have to say, I can wallow with the rest of them. And I was feeling it Thursday. I was just overwhelmed with pain and I didn't know how I was going to last three more months this uncomfortable. I am still in my second trimester, supposedly still feeling good...what is it going to be like next month.
Well, thankfully, the pain has gotten a lot better. I have had a couple of nights of good, restful sleep. And even though I am not pain-free, it is nothing like it was last week.
And even if it was, I need to be thankful that I have no complications during pregnancy. Baby is doing fine. I don't have to worry about health issues for me or the baby that might endanger either of us (some pregnant women I know do have to worry about those things). I have it pretty good and this too shall pass...and at the end, I will have a beautiful, healthy, baby boy, Lord willing. That is my prayer.
It really helped, also, to put things into perspective when one woman that I follow on a due date board online had her QUADRUPLETS on December 30th at 25 weeks. Yes, you read that right. She was just a couple of weeks ahead of me and had her babies. Whew! Everything was going great in her pregnancy. Obviously, she was high risk and followed very closely. She went into the doctor on the 30th and BAM! babies were coming. They thought they could stop the labor but the babies had other plans. It is amazing to see how they are doing and that they have all survived, none of them have brain bleeds, and most are not breathing on their own. Amazing.
Here is a link the their blog:
http://treverjennaeva.blogspot.com/
Next, another lady on the due date board online is having twins. It is a long, complicated story, but her membranes prematurely ruptured at 13 weeks. It is called pPROM (premature rupture of membranes). Usually this means the baby/babies will die because it is just too early to save them. Well, since it was twins, only one membrane ruptured. One twin is fine, the other is not. This lady is now 25 weeks or so. One of her twins will not live when he is born. The other should be fine. She also has a blog (warning: Offensive Language!!!!) that I follow:
http://notashamedinfertility.blogspot.com
There are several other stories that I could share that would break your heart or make you think, but these two are the primary ones I look at and say, "Thank you, Lord!". I have much to be thankful for. Even if I had to go through something like that, I should be thankful, but I am thankful that He has spared me that and has allowed me to have an uncomplicated pregnancy.
I have a lot to be thankful for!! I am going to try and remember this the next time I haven't slept or have intense pain. It could be a lot worse!!!
Now for the BIG news!!
The Mayo's are having a.......................
BOY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BOY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yep. It was confirmed today. And it is definitely a boy. And all looks good and healthy. I will not lie, a part of me was hoping for a girl. But, I am so glad that Carter will have a little brother to play with and grow up with. And there is no denying that little boys LOVE their mommas. We are thankful that all looks good and healthy.
Here are some pics!
Vegas, baby and turning 40
Well, I have heard you only turn 40 once so I figured I would do it big. So, I went to Vegas with two girlfriends and had a great time. I wasn't really planning on being 17 weeks pregnant when I went, but with two miscarriages in the past year, it just kind of happened that way.
We had a great time. We saw Bette Midler, one of the Cirque Du Soliel shows and we walked, and walked and walked and walked. And could have walked more. Five days was just not enough time to see everything. But the hotels are amazing, they are all set up on a theme, and you could spend days in some of them beofre you see everything.
Paris Las Vegas was my FAVORITE. I really cannot wait for Greg and I to head to Europe some day. I know one day it will happen and I can't wait. Anyway, the Paris in Las Vegas have replicas of many of the famous sites in the real Paris.
New York, New York was probably my second favorite. The funny thing is, I knew these would be my favorites before I even went to Vegas.
We ate a lot of good food (and french pastry). Laughed a lot, and well, just had an overall great time.
The highlight of the trip though had to be the day of my actual birthday. We had decided to spend the morning relaxing (much needed since this was our fourth day in Vegas). My friend, Nellie comes out of the bedroom with a wrapped gift and card. I started to scold her cause I thought she and Tracy had gotten me a gift when I had told them specifically not to.
Nellie informed me that it was not from them. I was confused (it was in the morning). So when she handed me the card and gift I saw the writing on the card and knew it was from Greg. I started to cry because I did not expect this at all. I had told Greg, also, not to get me anything. Vegas was enough.
So, I am crying, blaming it on the hormones, and I open the gift and it is a beautiful necklace in the shape of a heart with a mother and child at the top. The bottom part of the heart has emeralds and diamonds in it. It was very simple, yet gorgeous. It was so sweet. We took pictures of the moment and sent them to Greg via cell phone but since I did have morning hair and no make-up, I will not be posting the pictures.
So, all in all it was a great birthday.
My friend's Nellie and Tracy also had a little surprise for me on the Friday before the trip. We were all set to go get mani's and pedi's for the trip and my friend Marsha, who lives in Georgia, surprised me by joining us, along with my friend Heather. We had a blast and I was soooooo surprised.
Then, after Vegas, I had scheduled a birthday party at La Paz Mexican restaurant. It was a small, laid back event, but it was nice to close out the week with a party and cake, of course.
So all in all, I have no complaints about turning 40. I am pregnant, I have a great family and a wonderful husband and little boy. I am extremely blessed.
We had a great time. We saw Bette Midler, one of the Cirque Du Soliel shows and we walked, and walked and walked and walked. And could have walked more. Five days was just not enough time to see everything. But the hotels are amazing, they are all set up on a theme, and you could spend days in some of them beofre you see everything.
Paris Las Vegas was my FAVORITE. I really cannot wait for Greg and I to head to Europe some day. I know one day it will happen and I can't wait. Anyway, the Paris in Las Vegas have replicas of many of the famous sites in the real Paris.
New York, New York was probably my second favorite. The funny thing is, I knew these would be my favorites before I even went to Vegas.
We ate a lot of good food (and french pastry). Laughed a lot, and well, just had an overall great time.
The highlight of the trip though had to be the day of my actual birthday. We had decided to spend the morning relaxing (much needed since this was our fourth day in Vegas). My friend, Nellie comes out of the bedroom with a wrapped gift and card. I started to scold her cause I thought she and Tracy had gotten me a gift when I had told them specifically not to.
Nellie informed me that it was not from them. I was confused (it was in the morning). So when she handed me the card and gift I saw the writing on the card and knew it was from Greg. I started to cry because I did not expect this at all. I had told Greg, also, not to get me anything. Vegas was enough.
So, I am crying, blaming it on the hormones, and I open the gift and it is a beautiful necklace in the shape of a heart with a mother and child at the top. The bottom part of the heart has emeralds and diamonds in it. It was very simple, yet gorgeous. It was so sweet. We took pictures of the moment and sent them to Greg via cell phone but since I did have morning hair and no make-up, I will not be posting the pictures.
So, all in all it was a great birthday.
My friend's Nellie and Tracy also had a little surprise for me on the Friday before the trip. We were all set to go get mani's and pedi's for the trip and my friend Marsha, who lives in Georgia, surprised me by joining us, along with my friend Heather. We had a blast and I was soooooo surprised.
Then, after Vegas, I had scheduled a birthday party at La Paz Mexican restaurant. It was a small, laid back event, but it was nice to close out the week with a party and cake, of course.
So all in all, I have no complaints about turning 40. I am pregnant, I have a great family and a wonderful husband and little boy. I am extremely blessed.
Well. its a......................................
BIG TEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I haven't had my big Ultrasound yet so we don't know what the little babe is yet! HA HA HA HA.
Sorry, I just had to do it.
A dear gal came up to me last night and told me I needed to update my blog. First, she came up and asked if we were having a girl. Someone apparently had told her the Mayo's were having a girl. We were quite confused and she couldn't remember who had told her that information.
I told her I hoped she was prophesying cause I would love to have a girl. But, I would love to have a boy, too. I kind of go both ways. I really just want a healthy baby.
I did have my monthly doctor's appointment today. Everything is going well. Heard a nice strong heartbeat and we have scheduled the big Ultrasound for Tuesday, December 2nd! You will definitely be getting an update that day with pictures!!! I leave Thursday, December 4th for Minnesota with my mom and sister to go to the Mall of America. I am sure there will be some big purchases going on that weekend for baby.
The doctor did move my due date up. I think she moved it up too much but I am okay with it. I am now due in April on April 22nd. I was originally due May 1st.
Other than that all things are well. I leave in three days to celebrate the big 4-0 in Las Vegas with some friends.
I would update you on that trip but then I would have to kill you cause what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. LOL!
Sorry, I just had to do it.
A dear gal came up to me last night and told me I needed to update my blog. First, she came up and asked if we were having a girl. Someone apparently had told her the Mayo's were having a girl. We were quite confused and she couldn't remember who had told her that information.
I told her I hoped she was prophesying cause I would love to have a girl. But, I would love to have a boy, too. I kind of go both ways. I really just want a healthy baby.
I did have my monthly doctor's appointment today. Everything is going well. Heard a nice strong heartbeat and we have scheduled the big Ultrasound for Tuesday, December 2nd! You will definitely be getting an update that day with pictures!!! I leave Thursday, December 4th for Minnesota with my mom and sister to go to the Mall of America. I am sure there will be some big purchases going on that weekend for baby.
The doctor did move my due date up. I think she moved it up too much but I am okay with it. I am now due in April on April 22nd. I was originally due May 1st.
Other than that all things are well. I leave in three days to celebrate the big 4-0 in Las Vegas with some friends.
I would update you on that trip but then I would have to kill you cause what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. LOL!
Guess It's time to update....
We have big news to share. Of course, I think everyone knows it already but in case you don't...
Baby at 10 weeks (sorry it's a little blurry)Greg and I are EXPECTING!!!!!!!!!!!! Baby is due May 1, 2009 and I am officially out of the first trimester.
We are very excited. I was very guarded the first trimester so it still doesn't seem real to me. Even though I have had three Ultrasounds and have heard the heartbeat on the doppler. I am still cautious and a little anxious but I really don't know when that will subside. I was the same was with Carter. I am sure as I grow and feel the baby moving around it will feel more real, like it is really going to happen this time.
People keep asking me if I am excited, and other very common questions. I am excited to a certain extent but still feel very cautious. When people talk openly about the baby I get a little nervous like we are going to jinx it. Like all the "what ifs" keep coming to mind. I am definitely guarded. I guess it is to be expected. I just don't want the other shoe to drop.
But there are many happy days ahead. I am not sick anymore although I still get tired very easily. And I am sure in a few weeks I will "pop" and all of this will seem more real. Until then, I will just keep listening to that heartbeat and keep repeating to myself. "this is real". this is real"!
Here is Carter in his "I'm Going to be a BIG BROTHER" shirt.
It's been a rough week!
Carter fell last week while Greg was holding him and fell onto some hardwood flooring at my inlaws. Carter decided to use Greg's chest as leverage with his feet to wiggle out of Greg's arms. It was a horrible thing to see. It happened so fast and there he was.
I really don't want to go over the whole ordeal again. We have had to tell so many people (most of them doctors) what happened.
We thought Carter just had a broken collar bone until Saturday morning when we felt this soft spot on his head. We rushed him to the pediatrician, all the while, Carter was clueless that anything was wrong. The Ped said we could wait until Monday to go to Outpatient Xray at Vandy Children's Hospital. He said he could possibly have a skull fracture.
I really didn't worry about it too much over the weekend. It has been 4 days since his accident and he was acting completely normal for a busy, active two year old. So, I was very, very surprised when the xray turned into a CT scan and then we were told that Carter had a epidural hemorrhage in his brain, albeit small (that really doesn't make much difference to a mom to hear, that there is blood in your child's brain, but it is "small").
We were then escorted the the ER to be seen by a Neurosurgeon. He would review the CT scan and then tell us the plan. It was horrible, horrible. I was calling everybody. The tears were flowing, the "what ifs" were gaining grown in my brain. Then, I just became kind of numb. I think I had about as much as I could stand.
The long story short though, is that Carter is fine. I don't want to rehash all the details, again. But the Neurosurgeon said that what the CT scan showed was that the bleed was consistent with the fall. It was not new blood. We have to go back in 4 weeks for another xray to make sure his cracked skull is healing. My baby has a cracked skull. sniff sniff
It is interesting going into an ER (we have been in 2 different ones the past week) with a child that has an injury, or a trauma caused by a fall. They have to do their job and part of their job is to look for inconsistencies in the parent's stories. You know why? Because some parents beat there kids.
So, as a parent in an ER, we are all on level playing ground. Those doctors don't know me or my husband or how this patient really got hurt...until all the evidence is in.
We got the third degree at Vandy. Just because we were coming in 5 days after an accident with what could have been a new bleed or a new injury. Seemed a little suspicious I guess until they got all their information. But, I knew we were "under suspicion" when they ordered a full body xray of Carter. Yep, every single part of his body had to be xrayed.
Now, I have been a social worker in an ER so when the attending left and then someone from xray came in and then when I asked what was being xrayed and they told me, a head to toe xray, I knew. They were gathering information to make sure our baby didn't have other injuries, or old injuries. Old injuries that have not been treated will invariably prove signs of abuse.
So, I had a little too much information in my noggin to know what they were doing. Greg even knew after the attending left because he said, "that guy was asking a lot of weird questions". And he was.
But, you know, what I told Greg was they are doing their job, and thank goodness they do. Cause there are parents out there that abuse their kids. And they look just like us. They are rich, poor, prominent or from the projects. Abuse knows no socio-economic status. It does put a person on edge, especially coming from the background in social work and working in an ER in the past. Until we were "cleared", it just added one more piece of stress to the puzzle. But, I knew, as I told others on the phone, we haven't done anything wrong and that will show itself. And it did.
So, they were doing their job. Gathering data. And thankfully, like we knew it would, the evidence showed that Carter's head injury was consistent with the fall.
In fast, that is the exact words the resident used when he discharged us. "The head injury is consistent with the fall."
I don't know why I felt the need to write about this aspect of this whole ordeal except to get it off my chest. I am sure everyone that goes into the ER is innocent until proven otherwise, when it comes to kid's injuries. And I never felt blamed or was accused of anything. But I knew what they were looking for and it still bugged me. Even though it is part of their job. And thank goodness they do it.
So now, Carter just wears his sling in public, mostly at school, to remind him and his playmates that he has a "boo boo". He is on ibuprofen 2-3 times a day and he is going around like there is nothing wrong. His soft spot is getting smaller every day and his bruises on his chest are almost gone. It's amazing how little ones recover.
Now, if I could just recover from the whole ordeal, life would be good. And it will. I just need a few quiet days. Nearly impossible with a busy 2 year old!!
I really don't want to go over the whole ordeal again. We have had to tell so many people (most of them doctors) what happened.
We thought Carter just had a broken collar bone until Saturday morning when we felt this soft spot on his head. We rushed him to the pediatrician, all the while, Carter was clueless that anything was wrong. The Ped said we could wait until Monday to go to Outpatient Xray at Vandy Children's Hospital. He said he could possibly have a skull fracture.
I really didn't worry about it too much over the weekend. It has been 4 days since his accident and he was acting completely normal for a busy, active two year old. So, I was very, very surprised when the xray turned into a CT scan and then we were told that Carter had a epidural hemorrhage in his brain, albeit small (that really doesn't make much difference to a mom to hear, that there is blood in your child's brain, but it is "small").
We were then escorted the the ER to be seen by a Neurosurgeon. He would review the CT scan and then tell us the plan. It was horrible, horrible. I was calling everybody. The tears were flowing, the "what ifs" were gaining grown in my brain. Then, I just became kind of numb. I think I had about as much as I could stand.
The long story short though, is that Carter is fine. I don't want to rehash all the details, again. But the Neurosurgeon said that what the CT scan showed was that the bleed was consistent with the fall. It was not new blood. We have to go back in 4 weeks for another xray to make sure his cracked skull is healing. My baby has a cracked skull. sniff sniff
It is interesting going into an ER (we have been in 2 different ones the past week) with a child that has an injury, or a trauma caused by a fall. They have to do their job and part of their job is to look for inconsistencies in the parent's stories. You know why? Because some parents beat there kids.
So, as a parent in an ER, we are all on level playing ground. Those doctors don't know me or my husband or how this patient really got hurt...until all the evidence is in.
We got the third degree at Vandy. Just because we were coming in 5 days after an accident with what could have been a new bleed or a new injury. Seemed a little suspicious I guess until they got all their information. But, I knew we were "under suspicion" when they ordered a full body xray of Carter. Yep, every single part of his body had to be xrayed.
Now, I have been a social worker in an ER so when the attending left and then someone from xray came in and then when I asked what was being xrayed and they told me, a head to toe xray, I knew. They were gathering information to make sure our baby didn't have other injuries, or old injuries. Old injuries that have not been treated will invariably prove signs of abuse.
So, I had a little too much information in my noggin to know what they were doing. Greg even knew after the attending left because he said, "that guy was asking a lot of weird questions". And he was.
But, you know, what I told Greg was they are doing their job, and thank goodness they do. Cause there are parents out there that abuse their kids. And they look just like us. They are rich, poor, prominent or from the projects. Abuse knows no socio-economic status. It does put a person on edge, especially coming from the background in social work and working in an ER in the past. Until we were "cleared", it just added one more piece of stress to the puzzle. But, I knew, as I told others on the phone, we haven't done anything wrong and that will show itself. And it did.
So, they were doing their job. Gathering data. And thankfully, like we knew it would, the evidence showed that Carter's head injury was consistent with the fall.
In fast, that is the exact words the resident used when he discharged us. "The head injury is consistent with the fall."
I don't know why I felt the need to write about this aspect of this whole ordeal except to get it off my chest. I am sure everyone that goes into the ER is innocent until proven otherwise, when it comes to kid's injuries. And I never felt blamed or was accused of anything. But I knew what they were looking for and it still bugged me. Even though it is part of their job. And thank goodness they do it.
So now, Carter just wears his sling in public, mostly at school, to remind him and his playmates that he has a "boo boo". He is on ibuprofen 2-3 times a day and he is going around like there is nothing wrong. His soft spot is getting smaller every day and his bruises on his chest are almost gone. It's amazing how little ones recover.
Now, if I could just recover from the whole ordeal, life would be good. And it will. I just need a few quiet days. Nearly impossible with a busy 2 year old!!
Our exciting adventure to East Tennessee....
That sounds like an oxymoron cause East Tennessee is not that exciting, especially when you have lived there most of your life, which I did before I moved to Nashville in 1998. The exciting part was getting out of Nashville. We almost turned around and came home, but we stuck through and ended up in Knoxville around 7:30 EST, we left home (the first time) at 1:15 CST! Yep.
First off, that morning I talked to my friend Lisa, who we would be staying with that night before we headed off to our cabin. Well, she said on the news that Nashville was supposedly running out of gas. I told her that a couple of stations had been out most of the week but other stations had plenty and we shouldn't have a problem. Little did I know that there actually was a shortage. We had no idea until we kept attempting to buy gas...and there was none, or there were really, really long lines.
But let me back up. The first time we left home was around 1:15. We got on Briley Pkwy and I realized that I left all the paperwork at home that we would need to check in. We had won this trip and it had some requirements so I thought, just to be safe, we better go back and get it in case it was required.
So we did. This was the second time we passed a gas station by our house that had a small line for buying gas. We passed it again going out after we had picked up our paperwork. We over-confidently felt that it was ridiculous that all these people were in line to buy gas. Surely, further out in the city it would not be this way. So, we opted not to stop and buy gas there to fill out tank up for the trip. BIG MISTAKE. But hindsight is 20/20.
So, we decided to try Lebanon Rd....same problem. Then Donelson Pike....same problem and still those pesky lines. Again, being confident that there was gas somewhere without a line we
tredged on.
We got to Mt. Juliet and our "low gas" light was still on. We decided that the Lebanon exit, past Mt. Juliet for those of you that don't live here, would be he best place to buy gas. We passed the Mt. Juliet exit only to be stopped by traffic. I mean a dead stop. It was not moving and some people were backing back up on the exit ramp to get back on Mt. Juliet Rd. We decided we should do that too and go Hwy 70 over to 109 and bypass whatever was going on. It was a good decision too, and I will tell you why a little later.
So, we passed a Kroger (with a long line) but at this point we had no choice but to stop cause we had no gas in our car. Remember, we are traveling with a 2 year old, stuck in a car seat. We had already been in the car about an hour and a half. But he really did great overall. After an hour of sitting in line, I got out of the car to use the restroom and to go buy some snacks. When I came back, there were still two cars ahead of ours so I took Carter out of the car to walk around a bit. About 20 minutes later Greg pulls up at the Kroger store filled up with gas.
Whew, what a relief. We just thought this was crazy.
So, we get on Hwy 70. It is now 3:45. Yep. Over 2 hours into our trip and we have barely left the Davidson County line. I called my friend Lisa and told her what was going on. She was shocked (so were we). We told her we would call her once we got back on the interstate and at that point, we didn't know when that would be exactly.
So then we moved on to the next obstacle, which was figuring out what was going on on the interstate. Greg called the traffic info line a couple of times and finally got information that there had been a wreck on mile marker something or other. We had no clue where that was but we got on Hwy 109 and was praying we had passed the wreck.
And we did. Just barely, and it was a good thing because traffic was completely stopped on I-40 E out of Nashville. They had closed the interstate. We would have been stuck in traffic for hours and if we had waited to buy gas in Lebanon, we would have run out of gas on the interstate. Luckily, we have AAA, but heck, how would they have gotten to us????
The rest of our trip was uneventful (thank goodness!) and it ended up taking us 5 hours to get to Knoxville, which should have just taken just less than three. Whew!!!
I will post pictures later. Oh, and we filled up on gas in Lebanon on the way home cause we knew the "gas shortage" was still going on.
Crazy that Nashville is the ONLY city that this is happening too????????? So now we are hoping people stop topping off their tanks every time they see a gas station open with gas. If everyone would just chill out this mini "crisis" will be over.
First off, that morning I talked to my friend Lisa, who we would be staying with that night before we headed off to our cabin. Well, she said on the news that Nashville was supposedly running out of gas. I told her that a couple of stations had been out most of the week but other stations had plenty and we shouldn't have a problem. Little did I know that there actually was a shortage. We had no idea until we kept attempting to buy gas...and there was none, or there were really, really long lines.
But let me back up. The first time we left home was around 1:15. We got on Briley Pkwy and I realized that I left all the paperwork at home that we would need to check in. We had won this trip and it had some requirements so I thought, just to be safe, we better go back and get it in case it was required.
So we did. This was the second time we passed a gas station by our house that had a small line for buying gas. We passed it again going out after we had picked up our paperwork. We over-confidently felt that it was ridiculous that all these people were in line to buy gas. Surely, further out in the city it would not be this way. So, we opted not to stop and buy gas there to fill out tank up for the trip. BIG MISTAKE. But hindsight is 20/20.
So, we decided to try Lebanon Rd....same problem. Then Donelson Pike....same problem and still those pesky lines. Again, being confident that there was gas somewhere without a line we
tredged on.
We got to Mt. Juliet and our "low gas" light was still on. We decided that the Lebanon exit, past Mt. Juliet for those of you that don't live here, would be he best place to buy gas. We passed the Mt. Juliet exit only to be stopped by traffic. I mean a dead stop. It was not moving and some people were backing back up on the exit ramp to get back on Mt. Juliet Rd. We decided we should do that too and go Hwy 70 over to 109 and bypass whatever was going on. It was a good decision too, and I will tell you why a little later.
So, we passed a Kroger (with a long line) but at this point we had no choice but to stop cause we had no gas in our car. Remember, we are traveling with a 2 year old, stuck in a car seat. We had already been in the car about an hour and a half. But he really did great overall. After an hour of sitting in line, I got out of the car to use the restroom and to go buy some snacks. When I came back, there were still two cars ahead of ours so I took Carter out of the car to walk around a bit. About 20 minutes later Greg pulls up at the Kroger store filled up with gas.
Whew, what a relief. We just thought this was crazy.
So, we get on Hwy 70. It is now 3:45. Yep. Over 2 hours into our trip and we have barely left the Davidson County line. I called my friend Lisa and told her what was going on. She was shocked (so were we). We told her we would call her once we got back on the interstate and at that point, we didn't know when that would be exactly.
So then we moved on to the next obstacle, which was figuring out what was going on on the interstate. Greg called the traffic info line a couple of times and finally got information that there had been a wreck on mile marker something or other. We had no clue where that was but we got on Hwy 109 and was praying we had passed the wreck.
And we did. Just barely, and it was a good thing because traffic was completely stopped on I-40 E out of Nashville. They had closed the interstate. We would have been stuck in traffic for hours and if we had waited to buy gas in Lebanon, we would have run out of gas on the interstate. Luckily, we have AAA, but heck, how would they have gotten to us????
The rest of our trip was uneventful (thank goodness!) and it ended up taking us 5 hours to get to Knoxville, which should have just taken just less than three. Whew!!!
I will post pictures later. Oh, and we filled up on gas in Lebanon on the way home cause we knew the "gas shortage" was still going on.
Crazy that Nashville is the ONLY city that this is happening too????????? So now we are hoping people stop topping off their tanks every time they see a gas station open with gas. If everyone would just chill out this mini "crisis" will be over.
Toddler Property Laws
If I like it, it's mine!
If it's in my hand, it's mine!
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine!
If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way!
If I am doing or building something, all the pieces are mine!
If it looks just like mine, it's mine!
If I think it is mine, it's mine!
So, this is what is going on at our house ALL THE TIME!!! I think we hear the word, "MINE!" 50 times A DAY. That is no exaggeration. If Carter picks it up, it is his. Even if it's my cell phone or wallet, etc. It really doesn't matter what it is, if Carter has it, it's his.
If we need to take a toy away from Carter, he refuses because "it's mine!".
So, we are in major discipline mode. I have to say it is quite embarrasing when he flails on the floor in public when he refuses to do something. But, I figure there is not a mom and dad who has not had to go through this. We will just be glad when this stage is OVER and we can have our sweet baby boy back. We see glimpses of him. Yesterday after his nap he was a dreamboat.
But to tell you how much we put Carter in a "break" (or time out) whatever you want to call it, Carter came up to Greg last night and pointed to his goofy figurine which he had stood up on an exercise ball that I have. Carter informed Greg that Goofy was in time-out....because he had made a mess, he explained.
Yeah, we had a pretty good laugh about that one!
Carter's big boy bed...
Here are some pictures of Carter with his new bed. It is actually his crib that is converted into a toddler bed. The first three are of the bed and him getting used to it. The fourth picture is of him actually asleep in his bed for the first time.
Sniff. Sniff! He's not so little anymore!!
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Sniff. Sniff! He's not so little anymore!!
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The Bible No Go Me!
Right now I am listen to Carter in his room singing to himself. It is simply adorable and I have to get it on video.
He is singing Jesus Loves Me. When he gets to the part that says, "the Bible tells me so". He says, "the Bible no go me".
Carter is a late talker and he is doing great now in the talking department but sometimes he substitutes words or phrases for ones that he knows and can pronounce rather than the ones that he can't. Like "tells me so". He obviously has a block there and now he says, "no go me" EVERY TIME. He also does it in a part of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star...'no go me' comes up again.
It is even more adorable when he is trying to carry on a conversation with you (which I am working hard at every day teaching him how to talk and share things with me). He will start his sentence out with the right words, the middle gets lost somewhere, then he gets back on track at the end and he always ends the sentence with a "mommy" or "daddy" at the end.
The even funnier thing is that most of the time we know exactly what he is trying to tell us. I generally interpret to the rest of the world when they ask him a question.
Another funny thing is that Carter will not say his name. People come up to him all the time and ask him what his name is and he acts like he has no clue. Whenever he sees a little boy, including himself in a picture he calls him "Jacob", cause Jacob is his best bud. When I ask Carter what his name is he says, " Jacob". It has gotten to the point where he thinks it is funny. He knows he isn't Jacob but he see's how it gets to me so he just laughs and says, Jacob!
Here is how the conversation went the other night.
Me: Carter, what is your name?
Carter: Jacob (it actually sounds like Teecob)
Me: No, Carter, what is your name?
Carter: Jacob
(we both start laughing, I admit, I am encouraging him)
Me: No, Carter, who are you? What is your name? Your name? (as I point to his chest)
Carter: Jacob
Me: (sigh) Ok, Carter, can you say 'Car'
Carter: Cawrs
Me: Good!!!! No can you say Ter
Carter: Tewr
Me: Great!!! Now say, Car Ter
Carter: (pause) Jacob! (with eruption of laughter!!)
I admit I start laughing too. This kid is too smart for his own good!
He is singing Jesus Loves Me. When he gets to the part that says, "the Bible tells me so". He says, "the Bible no go me".
Carter is a late talker and he is doing great now in the talking department but sometimes he substitutes words or phrases for ones that he knows and can pronounce rather than the ones that he can't. Like "tells me so". He obviously has a block there and now he says, "no go me" EVERY TIME. He also does it in a part of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star...'no go me' comes up again.
It is even more adorable when he is trying to carry on a conversation with you (which I am working hard at every day teaching him how to talk and share things with me). He will start his sentence out with the right words, the middle gets lost somewhere, then he gets back on track at the end and he always ends the sentence with a "mommy" or "daddy" at the end.
The even funnier thing is that most of the time we know exactly what he is trying to tell us. I generally interpret to the rest of the world when they ask him a question.
Another funny thing is that Carter will not say his name. People come up to him all the time and ask him what his name is and he acts like he has no clue. Whenever he sees a little boy, including himself in a picture he calls him "Jacob", cause Jacob is his best bud. When I ask Carter what his name is he says, " Jacob". It has gotten to the point where he thinks it is funny. He knows he isn't Jacob but he see's how it gets to me so he just laughs and says, Jacob!
Here is how the conversation went the other night.
Me: Carter, what is your name?
Carter: Jacob (it actually sounds like Teecob)
Me: No, Carter, what is your name?
Carter: Jacob
(we both start laughing, I admit, I am encouraging him)
Me: No, Carter, who are you? What is your name? Your name? (as I point to his chest)
Carter: Jacob
Me: (sigh) Ok, Carter, can you say 'Car'
Carter: Cawrs
Me: Good!!!! No can you say Ter
Carter: Tewr
Me: Great!!! Now say, Car Ter
Carter: (pause) Jacob! (with eruption of laughter!!)
I admit I start laughing too. This kid is too smart for his own good!
Beautiful poem I found...
I found this poem online. Supposedly, it was written by a husband whose wife was suffering from infertility. I think this can apply to many aspects of the Christians life so I wanted to share it.
WAIT Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried.
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, He replied.
I pleaded, and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child you must wait."
"Wait? You say wait"? my indignant reply,
"Lord, I need some answers, I need to know why.
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your word.
My future, and all to which I can relate,
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go ahead sign,
Or even a 'no', to which I can resign.
And Lord, you have promised that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I have been asking, and this is my cry,
I'm weary of asking, I need a reply!
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied again, "You must wait."
So I slumped in my chair; defeated and taut
And grumbled to God; "So I'm waiting, for what?"
He seemed then to kneel and His eyes met with mine
And he tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, darken the sun,
Raise the dead, cause the mountains to run.
"All you see I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want, but you wouldn't know me.
You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint:
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.
"You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust, just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in me,
When darkness and silence was all you could see.
"You would never experience that fullness of love,
As the peace of my spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of my heart.
"The glow of my comfort late in the night;
The faith that I give when you walk without sight;
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.
"And you never would know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that 'My grace is sufficient for thee.'
Yes, your dreams for that loved one overnight could come true,
But the loss! if you lost what I'm doing in you.
"So be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though often may answers seem terribly late
My most precious answer of all.....is still......wait."
My big boy is growing up.
Yes, and I am tearing up about it.
Greg and I are starting to transition Carter to a big boy bed. He can climb out of his crib now, so that kind of constitutes change. We also have lots of potty training books and DVD's. Carter talks about the potty incessantly. He takes his diaper off when he has too much pee in it...and sometimes he takes it off when he poo's. Yeah, those are great moments of discovering your naked child talking about the potty and poop laying all over the floor...good times. But, that just means he is getting ready to be potty trained. Another milestone. Another change.
Speaking of change, I don't like it.
We are moving Carter to a new mothers-day-out program. We do this very hesitantly but it was necessary as I have a meeting I go to every Wednesday afternoon and I have been paying a sitter to watch Carter so I can go. So, we needed a Mothers-day-out program that meets on Wednesday.
I didn't realize how hard this would be. His old program is at our church and we know all the people there. It is great and very familiar to us. This new place, which is also a church, is new. I don't know anyone there and it is a little scary. It is change.
Another part of change is leaving friends. Carter has a little friend Jacob. He asks for him. He loves playing with him and they always have a good time. It is exhausting watching them play together. What a bundle of energy. It gives you a clue what twin boys would be like. Whew!!!!
So anyway, it breaks my heart that Carter is leaving his first little buddy, who also goes to our old MDO program. I have never felt my heart break over something like that.
Then it got me thinking. All the hurdles that Carter is going to face. The disappointments. The trails. I am going to have to let him go through them. There are some parents who scoop their children up to save them from pain, but you are not really doing a service to them when you do that. How painful is it going to be when Carter feels his first rejection? His first betrayal? What if he struggles in school, or in a particular subject?
Who cares about his first broken bone or which college he gets into? What about unrequited love? Or the cruel remarks of stupid junior high kids, which we all know are the cruelest kids in the world.
I will be there for him through all of that but he is the one who is going to have to learn to persevere, otherwise, he will learn nothing.
But the pain a mom and dad feels when their child is going through some of the things mentioned above must be SO hard and difficult. I am not looking forward to those moments. I am having a hard enough time with him "losing" his little buddy at two and a half!!! Yikes!
But they will be teaching moments. And learning moments. And he will grow. He will learn and turn into this wonderful grown up person because of it. And, I will have had a small (OK, big) part in that. But the Lord will receive ALL the glory because if I am any kind of accomplished parent it is due to the love and the grace of God, who found favor on me and believed in my abilities enough to bless me with this gift. The gift of motherhood. He knows that we can do it, through HIM.
So, for that, it is worth it. It is worth opening your heart up more than you ever imagined, even more than the love of a spouse (it's just different, you know).
The expression is true, a mother really knows what it is like to wear her heart forever on her sleeve. So true.
Greg and I are starting to transition Carter to a big boy bed. He can climb out of his crib now, so that kind of constitutes change. We also have lots of potty training books and DVD's. Carter talks about the potty incessantly. He takes his diaper off when he has too much pee in it...and sometimes he takes it off when he poo's. Yeah, those are great moments of discovering your naked child talking about the potty and poop laying all over the floor...good times. But, that just means he is getting ready to be potty trained. Another milestone. Another change.
Speaking of change, I don't like it.
We are moving Carter to a new mothers-day-out program. We do this very hesitantly but it was necessary as I have a meeting I go to every Wednesday afternoon and I have been paying a sitter to watch Carter so I can go. So, we needed a Mothers-day-out program that meets on Wednesday.
I didn't realize how hard this would be. His old program is at our church and we know all the people there. It is great and very familiar to us. This new place, which is also a church, is new. I don't know anyone there and it is a little scary. It is change.
Another part of change is leaving friends. Carter has a little friend Jacob. He asks for him. He loves playing with him and they always have a good time. It is exhausting watching them play together. What a bundle of energy. It gives you a clue what twin boys would be like. Whew!!!!
So anyway, it breaks my heart that Carter is leaving his first little buddy, who also goes to our old MDO program. I have never felt my heart break over something like that.
Then it got me thinking. All the hurdles that Carter is going to face. The disappointments. The trails. I am going to have to let him go through them. There are some parents who scoop their children up to save them from pain, but you are not really doing a service to them when you do that. How painful is it going to be when Carter feels his first rejection? His first betrayal? What if he struggles in school, or in a particular subject?
Who cares about his first broken bone or which college he gets into? What about unrequited love? Or the cruel remarks of stupid junior high kids, which we all know are the cruelest kids in the world.
I will be there for him through all of that but he is the one who is going to have to learn to persevere, otherwise, he will learn nothing.
But the pain a mom and dad feels when their child is going through some of the things mentioned above must be SO hard and difficult. I am not looking forward to those moments. I am having a hard enough time with him "losing" his little buddy at two and a half!!! Yikes!
But they will be teaching moments. And learning moments. And he will grow. He will learn and turn into this wonderful grown up person because of it. And, I will have had a small (OK, big) part in that. But the Lord will receive ALL the glory because if I am any kind of accomplished parent it is due to the love and the grace of God, who found favor on me and believed in my abilities enough to bless me with this gift. The gift of motherhood. He knows that we can do it, through HIM.
So, for that, it is worth it. It is worth opening your heart up more than you ever imagined, even more than the love of a spouse (it's just different, you know).
The expression is true, a mother really knows what it is like to wear her heart forever on her sleeve. So true.
My poor husband...
Saturday is usually the day that I try to "make" breakfast, which usually includes bacon. It is highly unusual for Greg to get real, pork bacon. Since his father has heart disease and high cholesterol and Greg's cholesterol is slightly elevated, about the only time he gets real bacon is if we are at Cracker Barrel. My husband LOVES bacon. Especially when it is cooked the right way, very crisp, but not burned.
Anyway, this past Saturday we were all up and about and Greg goes to the fridge and pulls out something and has this look on his face. It is the look of a happy child who has just found extra candy under the couch. Or an adult who finds $5.00 in their pocket when they didn't know it was there.
Most of you know my husband. He hides his excitement well, at least to you. Since I live with him I see the real Greg. He does get excited. He can be goofy. He's funny and just an all around great guy to be around. In my humble opinion.
Well, the look on his face was priceless. He was almost giddy. He was excited beyond any excitement I had seen in a while. He was almost doing a little dance in front of the refrigerator.
Imagine my surprise when I see that all that excitement is for bacon. Greg pulled out real bacon. I didn't realize it until I looked at his face and then to the package. I thought it was the new turkey bacon pack I had just bought. Not so....
Unfortunately, Greg's glee was short lived. The real bacon was old. Greg's smile deflated quickly. We looked at the date, it said something about September. Greg got excited again. He was tossing it around in his head, I could tell...."is it worth the risk of food poisoning to get "real" bacon?????" It was discolored, kind of a mucky brown and not nice and pink like bacon should be.
I said, "I will make it for you if you want me to, but there is a fresh pack of turkey bacon in the fridge."
Greg thinks a minute. It is cured meat....maybe it's not bad.....
Sigh. No he concedes that the real bacon is too old. He will have turkey bacon. He is sad.
He opens the freezer door and is looking all through it.
I say, "What are you looking for?"
Greg: "waffles" (You can tell I am a homemade breakfast maker, huh?)
I pause, "Um, we don't have any waffles, sorry".
Greg: (sigh) "That's okay".
He just didn't get a break Saturday! I guess I have one to make up to him, huh? Maybe some homemade blueberry pancakes with REAL bacon this Saturday....it can't hurt his cholesterol that much, right?
Anyway, this past Saturday we were all up and about and Greg goes to the fridge and pulls out something and has this look on his face. It is the look of a happy child who has just found extra candy under the couch. Or an adult who finds $5.00 in their pocket when they didn't know it was there.
Most of you know my husband. He hides his excitement well, at least to you. Since I live with him I see the real Greg. He does get excited. He can be goofy. He's funny and just an all around great guy to be around. In my humble opinion.
Well, the look on his face was priceless. He was almost giddy. He was excited beyond any excitement I had seen in a while. He was almost doing a little dance in front of the refrigerator.
Imagine my surprise when I see that all that excitement is for bacon. Greg pulled out real bacon. I didn't realize it until I looked at his face and then to the package. I thought it was the new turkey bacon pack I had just bought. Not so....
Unfortunately, Greg's glee was short lived. The real bacon was old. Greg's smile deflated quickly. We looked at the date, it said something about September. Greg got excited again. He was tossing it around in his head, I could tell...."is it worth the risk of food poisoning to get "real" bacon?????" It was discolored, kind of a mucky brown and not nice and pink like bacon should be.
I said, "I will make it for you if you want me to, but there is a fresh pack of turkey bacon in the fridge."
Greg thinks a minute. It is cured meat....maybe it's not bad.....
Sigh. No he concedes that the real bacon is too old. He will have turkey bacon. He is sad.
He opens the freezer door and is looking all through it.
I say, "What are you looking for?"
Greg: "waffles" (You can tell I am a homemade breakfast maker, huh?)
I pause, "Um, we don't have any waffles, sorry".
Greg: (sigh) "That's okay".
He just didn't get a break Saturday! I guess I have one to make up to him, huh? Maybe some homemade blueberry pancakes with REAL bacon this Saturday....it can't hurt his cholesterol that much, right?
Oswald Chambers never ceases to amaze me
I think I have mentioned on her before that I read Oswald Chambers every morning. Most of the time it gets me started on my bible study. Sometimes, with a busy two year old, that is as far as I get, breathing a prayer as I go.
Well, today, July 16th, was another perfect example of how I can read My Utmost for His Highest every day and still get something deep out of it. And not only deep, but relevant. Relevant to me, what people around me are going through. A word I can share with a friend.
So, here it is. This is ALLLLL Oswald...
Well, today, July 16th, was another perfect example of how I can read My Utmost for His Highest every day and still get something deep out of it. And not only deep, but relevant. Relevant to me, what people around me are going through. A word I can share with a friend.
So, here it is. This is ALLLLL Oswald...
THE CONCEPT OF DIVINE CONTROL
"...how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!" (Matthew 7:11)
Jesus is laying down the rules of conduct in this passage for those people who have His Spirit. He urges us to keep our minds filled with the concept of God's control over everything, which means that a disciple must maintain an attitude of perfect trust and an eagerness to ask and to seek.
Fill your mind with the though that God is there. And once your mind is truly filled with that thought, when you experience difficulties it will be as easy as breathing for you to remember, "My heavenly Father knows all about this!" This will be no effort at all, but will be a natural thing for you when difficulties and uncertainties arise. Before you formed this concept of divine control so powerfully in your mind, you used to go from person to person seeking help, but now you go to God about it. Jesus is laying down the rules of conduct for those people who have His Spirit, and it works on the following principle: God is my Father, He loves me, and I will never thing of anything that He will forget, so why should I worry?
Jesus said there are times when God cannot lift the darkness from you, but you should trust Him. At times God will appear like an unkind friend, but He is not; He will appear like an unnatural father, but He is not; He will appear like an unjust judge, but He is not. Keep the thought that the mind of God is behind all things strong and growing. Not even the smallest detail of life happens unless God's will is behind it. Therefore, you can rest in perfect confidence in Him. Prayer is not only asking , but it is an attitude of the mind which produces the atmosphere in which asking is perfectly natural. "Ask, and it will be given to you..." (7:7)
She's gone...
Below are a few pictures of my friend Roxanne, whom I am remembering today. Today is the one year anniversary of her death.
A picture of Rox and I with our friend, Jessica, at my wedding in 2003
A picture of Roxanne with my son, Carter in July of 2006
A picture of Rox and I with our friend, Lisa, who lives in East Tennessee
Ah, a picture of Rox with our friend, Mark, in 2006
Finally, a picture of the ole Bible study gang in East Tennessee in July of 06. We had a "reunion" of sorts, and boy, are we glad that we did. Here we are playing charades. We always had bible study and then played charades...good times!!!I'll never forget those words. She's gone.
It was one year ago today that I sat in my in-laws neighborhood and heard those words. I had been chatting with my sister on the way to get Carter from Greg's parents after volunteering at Vacation Bible school for the second day. My husband Greg kept beeping in while I was on the phone, very unusual for him to do that, but I just kept chatting away. I didn't really give it a second thought. Also, my friend Lisa, in Knoxville, had called too and was beeping in, how strange, I thought. Finally, I told my sister I needed to go because Greg kept beeping in. If only I could have savored that moment a little while longer. It was innocent. There was no shock or grief to come. No tears. I was having a happy little conversation with my sister and all the sudden my world shattered.
I finally called Greg and he told me about the message that Krista, Roxanne's cousin, had left on our machine at home. That Roxanne had passed away. WHAT??????????? I didn't believe it, didn't want to believe it. I just sat on the side of the road in shock. Luckily I had not retrieved Carter yet and he stayed at the inlaws a bit longer.
When I called the number I can't remember who I talked to first, Krista, I think. She gave me details. It was very sudden and unexpected. Then Alice, Rox's mom, got on the phone.
Me: "Alice???????" I wish you could have heard the sound of my voice. In an incredulous tone, I was asking if it was real all by just saying, "Alice?????"
Alice: "She's gone, Susan. She's gone"
I learned that Roxanne had been found in her apartment, sitting up, in bed. I won't go into the details but she had sleep apnea and had not been wearing her machine that helped her keep breathing at night. They feel she just stopped breathing. But, they were doing an autopsy to make sure that it was nothing else. After the autopsy and study of all her meds she had in her room, it was found that she just stopped breathing and died.
Roxanne had been through a lot the past few years. But her life was on an upswing. She had lost some weight. She had finally accepted her disabilities, or was getting there anyway. She had chronic, sometime severe, pain from IBS and Fibromyalgia. She had overcome an addiction to painkillers but, still had to take them sometimes to ease the pain. We were all very proud of her. She had found a new church home and was really excited about her church.
I was able to talk to her about two weeks before he death and she spoke clearly and upbeat. She was so excited about her parent's upcoming wedding anniversary party that she was planning. She sounded like the "old" Rox. The one that sometimes rarely made an appearance. It had been a long time since I had heard from the "old" Rox. I am glad we got to have that conversation before she died and not like some of the others that we have had. Where she was depressed, drugged, and not the Roxanne I knew and loved. No, this Roxanne was THE Roxanne I knew and loved and it was so good to hear her voice.
And everyone close to her had pretty much the same thing to say. Things were on an upswing. What a shock this was. She had never been happier. I found out at the receiving of friends that there were rumors that Roxanne had killed herself and that is why she had a closed casket. This was very far from the truth, however, I think there was a time in her life when we would not have been shocked if she had taken her life. She battled depression, like I said before, and there were some very, very low points the past few years. In fact, when I heard that she had died, the first thing that came to my mind was, "did she kill herself??" Again, the autopsy found nothing that would point to suicide.
Well, I was able to see Roxanne in a private viewing before we laid her to rest. Her parents were not happy about her appearance, THAT is why they did not want an open casket. They wanted everyone to remember the Roxie that they loved. Not the one in the casket. Roxanne simply stopped breathing. She wasn't wearing her machine for her sleep apnea. Period. She did not look like herself in that casket. But, I am so glad that I was able to say goodbye in person.
All day today and the past few days I have been thinking about July 10, 2007. I have been thinking about her funeral and her life. I have had several dreams about Roxanne the past few weeks. It isn't unusual. And today, I am remembering happy times. Roxanne's laugh. Our trips together. The time we were roommates (not a good thing). We go way back. Wow.
I don't guess I will ever get used to the idea that she is gone. I just have to come face to face with it every now and then. Then I go on, like it hasn't really happened, until, abruptly and uninvited, it crosses my mind, reminding me that it is in fact true.
She is gone. And I won't see her again on this side of heaven. But, I do "see" her everyday. In some shape or form. She is here. She is gone, but never forgotten.
Love you, Rox and I miss you a lot!!!!
Okay, some pictures at least...right
Me and Roxie's parents
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Roxie's grave
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I brought a UT emblem to put on her grave. I am going to order her a flag like the rest that are placed there.
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Me and Carter
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Carter and Daddy
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More to come later of our whole trip.
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Roxie's grave
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I brought a UT emblem to put on her grave. I am going to order her a flag like the rest that are placed there.
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Me and Carter
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Carter and Daddy
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More to come later of our whole trip.
We are finally home...
Well, we have been home since Wednesday but I am still too pooped to write about all of our experiences.
All I know is that it is very exhausted traveling to another country by car and plane with a two year old and we won't be doing that again anytime soon! WHEW! I think Greg and I need a weekend away to recover from our 8 day vacation!
Everything went well. In the next few days I will share my experiences with Rox's parents and visiting her grave. I will also have to share about my embarrasing moment with the airport security guard on the way home. It is embarrasing because I made an idiot of myself. But I claim exhaustion and grief catching up with me to blame. I flew off the handle. Period. I am thankful for grace because it is truly humbling.
Anyway, more later. We are home, enjoying the weekend and still trying to recoup!
All I know is that it is very exhausted traveling to another country by car and plane with a two year old and we won't be doing that again anytime soon! WHEW! I think Greg and I need a weekend away to recover from our 8 day vacation!
Everything went well. In the next few days I will share my experiences with Rox's parents and visiting her grave. I will also have to share about my embarrasing moment with the airport security guard on the way home. It is embarrasing because I made an idiot of myself. But I claim exhaustion and grief catching up with me to blame. I flew off the handle. Period. I am thankful for grace because it is truly humbling.
Anyway, more later. We are home, enjoying the weekend and still trying to recoup!
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